Frank Carson

UTLEY: Lorna Rose Treen's pundit was like this (and, no, you shouldn't need to be concerned about any danger of wetting your pants): 'I started dating a zookeeper, but it turned out that he was a cheetah.' This year's champion loses on every count, according to my book. Yes, I can see it in a clunking way, but the mention of the zookeeper's occupation sets up the pun in the punchline. Well, perhaps I'm being unfair on Lorna Rose. I admit that I wasn't in the audience at her Edinburgh show, which received some rave reviews, but I do know that an awful lot comes from timing and delivery.

Frank Carson, a comedian, is up for auction for more than £4 million. On Spain's world-famous Costa del Sol, the stunning Alhambra-style villa is at the forefront of the prestigious Marbella Club Golf Resort. Mr Carson, a Belfast boy who died in 2012, was best known for his satisfaction with "It's a cracker" and "It's the way I tell 'em." Mr Carson had been stationed in the British Army's Parachute Regiment for three years, as well as doing Middle East tours before his time on television.

EPHRAIM HARDCASTLE: A Channel 5 documentary that was airing weeks before the coronation is expected to rebut a claim that Charles used his fame with the MoD to have Harry recalled early from military service in Afghanistan. In Charles & Harry: No Way Back? This is an update to a 2021 documentary about the family rift, according to reports that Harry was 'implicated' in his decision to recall him in 2008 out of 'a desire to safeguard his son'. Despite the lack of concrete facts, Anjula Mutanda, a marriage specialist, would have been in protection mode as a parent.' "I know what I'm doing, don't interfere," the son, [Harry] would have said. Lots to think about, especially if Harry turns up for dad's throne. As the centime falls over King Charles' weekend visit, Gallic groans from President Macron's beleaguered allies. What should have been a great moment for the Elysee Palace - the King's overseas debut - is now a potential headache with one TV pundit observing: 'When the sans-culottes are rioting in central Paris and setting fires in the streets, the last thing they will want to be fed is taunting TV pictures of a King and a president feasting at the Palace of Versailles!'La vie n'est-elle pas grandiose? Stewart Lee, a burton, makes a joking about the fact that Fiona Bruce's husband Nigel Sharrocks is a Tory donor. He isn't the only one who can't. The mistake was fixed in the newspaper. To paraphrase the late Frank Carson: 'Tis the way you tell 'em Stewart!'